Thursday, April 18, 2013

The Analogy

I find a toad in my yard
The bigger the better
I easily catch him

In my hand, he does not have the intelligence to describe what is going on
But his instincts tell him he is in danger, and he releases his bladder on me
I have a fish hook, and two feet of filament
I push the hook into the edge of the toad's mouth, and dangle him in the air by the line

He does not have the intelligence to describe what is going on
But he has the brain structure to feel the pain and the fear
He kicks and twists and struggles to try to escape the danger that has befallen him

I carry him dangling by the hook in his mouth to the dogs' water bucket
I plunge him under the water and hold the line to the bucket's bottom
The toad cannot breath
He kicks and twists and struggles to try to escape the danger that has befallen him

After about 30 seconds, not long, I pull him out of the water
I remove the hook from his mouth
The hook has damaged his flesh some, but my conscious is clear knowing I did not kill the toad
I take him to the edge of the woods, and let I him go

I have had so much fun with all of that, I cannot wait to find another toad and do it again
I hope the next one is even bigger

7 comments:

  1. I'm Dick Cheney, and I approved this message.

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  2. I AM SHOCKED. CALL THE POLICE. Someone has kidnapped our beloved, kind-hearted Janet Lee and replaced her with this sadistic doppelganger. My world has been turned upside down. I have to go find someplace to lie down and hyperventilate.

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    Replies
    1. Oh Lyn, Honey, you really don't know me. Puppies are even more fun.

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    2. This is not you. And you is not this. Let's file a missing person report. An All Points Bulletin.

      MISSING: Janet Lee. Big smile. Heart as big as Kansas. Swerves car to miss wooly bear caterpillars, won't eat catsup because there's cat in it, seen movie Old Yeller 97 times, cries every time. Only buys shoes made out of hemp but feels bad so many hemps were killed just to make her shoes. That's OUR Janet Lee.

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    3. Lyn, and I love you WHY????
      You are the BEST!!!!

      Delete
  3. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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